Explaining BPD To Others

BDP is extremely difficult for someone who doesn’t have it to understand. I have it and sometimes I don’t understand it myself. The best way I would explain it to someone is this. Picture someone who has a deep open wound next to someone who has perfect healed skin. If someone was to hurt one of them, one is much more vulnerable than the other. For people with BPD it feels like that “protective coat” is missing. So we take things to heart and we react more aggressively or we get hurt easier. We also love till there’s nothing left, which is most dangerous for ourselves. We can be in a room full of people and still feel so alone. Our moods can be very all over the place. One second I would be in so much pain, feeling or numb and the next I could be laughing on the phone with my friends. The term for this is called splitting. People with BPD tend to get a certain look called “BPD eyes” where they can just zone out for an extended period of time as if they just shut out everything else going on. We just feel really numb and completely empty. Another way to explain BPD would be that we see things as either black or white, but that’s not life. For example if you texted a friend and they didn’t answer you for a few hours you’d think they’re probably just busy or didn’t see it, but people with BPD go straight to the extreme thinking “they hate me, I did something wrong, they don’t wanna be my friend, etc.” (black and white thinking) We’re not overreacting, our feelings are valid just like everyone else’s we just process things differently. 

Borderline Personality Disorder is one of the loneliest feelings I could ever describe. It feels like you're alone at night, but no ones out. There are no cars. No people. Just you alone watching the street lights change. If someone you care about or love is struggling with BPD please be patient and understanding. Don't dismiss them and let them know there feelings are heard and valued and what they feel is not their fault.